Good afternoon. Chase's attorney here. I am making my second appearance here at Taste The World to cover some important legal matters. I appreciate your attention. (My first appearance can be found here)
My client, Ms.Chase, has brought to my attention the fact that she is "SO totally over it" with several people and has asked for my assistance in the matter. Therefore, on behalf of Ms.Chase, I demand each named party to read, understand, and comply with my client's requests.
As for count number 1 (one), my client offers that she is SO totally over Ellen dancing through the audience on her talk show.
According to my client's recollection, it was "cute" the first few times but soon became "freaking annoying" and "totally gimicky". My client demands Ellen stop already, and adds an emphatic "SERIOUSLY" to her final statement.
As for count number 2 (two), my client offers that she is SO totally over Maroon 5.
My client purchased an album titled "Songs About Jane" in 2002 and enjoyed it, but after 5 years of nothing new, has become "so effing bored" with the band and the "girly whine ass" voice of Adam Levine. (By the way, releasing 2 CDs, one "live" and one "acoustic", rehashing the same songs from the first album and calling them "NEW"? Not-so-freaking-much. Legally speaking.) My client demands you to "shut up" because "too little, too late, buddy."
Finally, as for count number 3 (three), my client offers that she is SO totally over all this rain.
My client is attempting to complete a job outside and the rain is not helping her receive a paycheck. According to the forcast (as offered in the evidence below):
,
my client is going to "get totally screwed again" next week. My client hereby demands "MORE SUNSHINE, DAMMIT!!!"
In closing, I would like to say, on behalf of my client, Ms.Chase, that each named party shall respond to each demand forthwith. If response is not received in a timely and appropriate manner, we will not hesitate to take this matter to the appropriate authorities.
And by 'authorities', I mean 'I'll bitch more on the blog because that's all I got, yo.'
Further sayeth naught.
